Toast To Gold health!

In the olden times, gold was believed to have medicinal properties, and if people were not hammering out jewels or minting coins from them, they eat them instead...yes, Virginia, people EAT and DRINK gold. Well, not bars of them, silly. Just food with pure gold trimmings. Diet of Kings? Apparently not. I stumbled upon this article in Wikipedia about an alcoholic drink called Goldschlager which had actual flakes of gold leaf wafting inside!

So how much would bottle of Goldschlager cost? Would it be priced, like, well... Gold?

No that much it seems. A single 70cl bottle of this inebriating drink would cost £ 20.89 according to TheDrinkshop.com. In fact, the flakes of gold floating inside does not even weigh a tenth of a gram and the total value is something like $3.33. It just so happened that Gold is the most malleable of all metals, hence it can be beaten into sheets thinner than onion skin and still amount to very little.

As for the health benefits. Nothing much really. It doesn't give you a glowing persona inasmuch as you want it to. Nor does it kill you with Gold poisoning. Methinks, everyone says Iron is good for the body right? Why can't they make drinks with flakes of Iron inside? That would be really beneficial for the blood!

Just stay away from big magnets though.


More Gold Trivia:

• Gold flakes can also be found on two other drinks (Goldwasser and Gold Strike)
• Gold is approved as a food additive in the EU (E175 in the Codex Alimentarius).
• It is estimated that all the Gold ever mined in history would make a cube measuring 66 feet on all sides or 8000 cubic meters
• One of the most famous gold incidents in history was the Hajj caravan of Mansa Kankan Musa, the 14th century emperor of the African Mali Empire. It was noted that Mansa Musa was accompanied by a caravan consisting of 60,000 men including a personal retinue of 12,000 slaves, all of whom were clad in brocade and Persian silk. He also brought with him 80 to 100 camels loaded with 300 pounds of gold each. The emperor rode on horseback and was directly preceded by 500 slaves, each of whom carried a four-pound staff of solid gold.
  
  His generosity was also legendary for along the way, he caused the price of Gold to go down by flooding Cairo with so much Gold that the resulting inflation took a decade to subside.
• On May 3, 2007, the Royal Canadian Mint unveiled a Gold Maple Leaf coin with a face value of One Million Dollars,^[1] though the gold content was worth over $2 million at the time. It measures 50 cm in diameter by 3 cm thick and weighs 100 kilograms, with a purity of 99.999%
• Gold can be made into thread and used in embroidery.
• Gold is used as the reflective layer on some high-end CDs.
• Automobiles may use gold for heat insulation. McLaren uses gold foil in the engine compartment of its F1 model
• In nature, gold most often occurs in its native state (that is, as a metal), though usually alloyed with silver. Native gold contains usually eight to ten percent silver, but often much more — alloys with a silver content over 20% are called electrum. As the amount of silver increases, the color becomes whiter and the specific gravity becomes lower.
  
  
  
  
  
  Source: Wikipedia

Adventures in Myopia

FlHave you ever been in a situation so embarrassing you felt like a sticky, smelly piece of turd and whenever your mind strays into memories of the day you physically cringe or let a soft, whispered "shit!" slip from your lips?

Well, I've had a fair share of those. And an early start too.

My first tryst with embarrassment was way back in kindergarten. Our school used to have a waiting area near the gate where parents wait for their tots while sharing juicy gossip about everyone's lives except their own. The place would be crazy around late afternoon, when the PM kids get dismissed and start running around like headless chicken on the quadrangle. You see, playing for a while after classes is like a sacred ritual for most kids back then, except for nerds-in-the-making who trundle home early and finish their assignments before 6:30 pm in the name of almighty gold (come March).

I was never like that though. Although I liked books I was never pushed to outdo everybody else in academics. Suffice to say, I belong more to the jolly brethren of headless chicken, only worse, since I have poor eyesight. Mom said letting me run and play all over the place was an exercise in motherly worry and despair since I keep on tripping and scratching my knees and running and tripping again, all the while bumping unseen objects, classmates, teachers, nuns and an occassional principal (halaaaa! ma-o-opis kaaaa!). By the time I'm finished, a house rag would look sparkling white beside the thing I wear that looks like my polo, only several shades darker with the artistic hand impressions of half our class.

That's not the embarassing part though, the real winner was tugging at my mother's arm, clawing at her duster and using it to wipe the sweat dripping from my face and arms, only to look up and find that "mom" had shorter hair, missing teeth (at least she was smiling at me) and completely different face from my one, true mother.

I could've sworn I felt my hair stand up on end. My face felt like a balloon swelling to bursting point, and summoning all the pride and manhood I had at that time - I ran away. Fast. Really fast. I can hear my REAL mom hollering out at me from behind but it didn't matter anymore. I don't want to make the same mistake again. I resolved not to go home with anyone. I will go home on my own. I so adamantly refused to be overtaken by the sting of embarrassment that I hid inside some empty classroom, resolving to go home after everyone has left.

Well that was at least until mom came with the guard and dragged me home by the ears.

That's nothing though. I can shrug off pinches and sermons. It's the 5 year old ego that was really hurting. Myopia, I curse thee!

Trivia!

I've been a trivia junkie for as far back as I can remember. As a kid I turned to books for amusement because most of my toys would be lying broken minutes after I touch them. I'm so adept at taking things apart but not at putting them back into place.

Mom: I'm not buying you toys anymore!

Me: (staring at the armless Voltron robot) Why?

I grew up on David Attenborough's Life on Earth, The Living Planet, Saturday Fun Machine and of course Sesame Street. It was a healthy balance of closet dorkiness and play time that turned me into the insane deviant that I am today, but I digress.

Most dictionaries define trivia as knowledge that is, well, trivial. Unimportant, inconsequential and useless are some of the adjectives used to describe trivia. All pieces of Trivia are fact but not all fact can be used as Trivia. Fact, however, can be trivia depending on its usage. If you're talking to a doctor and you told him that your mandible is broken in three places you're telling a fact since he knows what the mandible is, but if you walked up to an average joe and told him that your mandible is the lower, movable part of the jaw, you're stating a piece of trivia since he might not know what the heck a mandible is. If you're a guy and joe thinks you're trying to pick him up that's when you end up with a mandible broken in three places, but again I digress.

So why am I addicted to useless knowledge then?

Simple. Knowing the answer to things gives me a certain degree of confidence and satisfaction. Trivial knowledge can also come in handy if I join quiz contests or gameshows. There are also several unorthodox uses for trivia. I have a friend named Tony who once boasted that he can say the phrase "I love you" in sixteen languages and dialects.

Tony: (proudly, to his crush) I can say I love you in 16 languages! Care to hear them?

Girl: I can answer that in two letters. N-O!

A lot of people believe that copious amounts of trivial knowledge=smartness. I beg to disagree. Trivia that came as result of genuine study and intellectual proficiency CAN equate to genuine smarts but trivia ingested and stored by rote to impress chicks or to bluff your way around cconversations won't serve any useful purpose. Take the case of the social climber who went to a gala event pretending to know everything about classical music. She comes up to a famous composer and asks:

Matron: Is Bach still composing?

Composer: No, madam. He's DE-composing.

I hope to share my love for useless knowledge with this blog. Those who don't agree can meet up with me and go home with a broken mandible, a dislocated femur and lacerated ego. Kidding!:)